The edge of curtains dull purple.
Still before sunrise.
And then, I remembered the drink
I used to like to have in the morning
When I was young.
I know. I’ll ask Moriwaki to fix.
Add instant coffee in
Steaming hot milk
And stir up, swirl around.
It’s good, it tastes morning.
I held the mug cup
With my left hand.
No matter how hard I tried
The cup wouldn’t move, and
Remained still where it was.
What else can I do? I held the cup
With both hands and sipped.
I’m losing the use of my left hand
From day to day.
I am left only with my right side.
Have mercy, I’m begging to spare just one.
I promise I’ll eat and trough.
A plate of salad with three kind of vegetables.
Shredded cabbage
Vigorous tomatoes
Crispy fresh cucumbers
Bamboo shoot rice
(Sis Kyoko’s special)
Dattan Buckwheet Tea
(Naoko bought for me)
(You won’t see it sold in stores.)
13:20
Visiting Nurse
Shimada-san
Massaged my feet.
It felt great.
Since I could not walk, she moved my feet as if they were walking.
I might walk again.
A faint sense of hope glimmers.
It felt that good.
By any remote chance, the nerves might re-connect.
It’s naïve to hope that. Silly me.
Just like drinking by myself to
Think that.
11:00
Residential care service stuff came
Moriwaki
Kumiko
I hope you will take good care of me.
18:25
I got a text message from KP
He is coming.
He wants to spend time with me
Till he misses me.
The short message murmurs
My expectation and
Your reality
Misses each other.
You say that I will not die.
Look me straight in the eye and
Face the music of my mortality.
Otherwise, I can’t live a life of now.
Otherwise I can’t live a life of us.
23:45
I am grateful to today
With a proper hug of goodbye．
The humidifier you’ve set up
Embraces me with a warm hug,
My heart and soul, and immobile body.
Have mercy I’m begging.
Please spare one, just one.
I pray to the starless night.
Poem by Maria Franki
Edited and translated by J.Ujiie
copyright 2011
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